I see an explosion, blue clouds of blazing fire whooshing everywhere ...

Fancy dress Lola at the end of last school year.

OMG, seriously OMG, I just sat down to write my blog, thinking I’d settle in for a bit on the sofa writing the toils and troubles of the endless days of my groundhog day life…..sorry, went off then. So, I sit down, then think I’ll make a cuppa, walking through the garage to ask Alex outside if he wanted one too (he’s on BBQ duty) I see an explosion, blue clouds of blazing fire whooshing everywhere like it’s just been given instructions to ‘Fly! Be free! Burn everything in your path! And above all, be blue and big and scary and HOT!’ It flies through the car (windows are open) Buster, Alex and I leap around like monkeys shouting ‘FIRE!’ collectively, which brings me to a point, why do you always shout the bleeding obvious when there’s a disaster ‘Fire’, ‘Bomb!’ ‘’Burglars!’? Where? Oh, it’s me giving examples, OK. Why? We all know, it’s VERY f*****g obvious, surely? But there we go, fact. So we prance about shouting the bleeding obvious in different directions,  after some serious monosyllabic discussion, ‘Fire!’ ‘Towel?’ ‘Water!’ “How?’ ‘Here’ ‘F***’, we establish water would be a good start. Alex tries to attach the hose and douse the car, the tap wouldn’t turn on, he waggles it violently to try and drip out a bit of liquid, in the mean time I grabbed Alex’s T-shirt, put the washing on (alright, I made that up), see a bottle of fizzy water and run towards the burning car, screaming for what my life is worth ‘Water!’ I have some difficulty getting the lid off, but Sheera with the power of Grey Skull (Google her if you have no idea who I refer to here) skills kick in, and I shake the fizzy water all over the burning interior and exterior. Buster flaps vigorously around doing a sterling job putting out the fire too with his bear hands…It’s alright Jo, he can get new hands the Dr said so. Only joking! He had a big flappy towel to aid him. And it’s out. Well done us! And I lived to tell the tale again! (please click here to refer to the burning down the public bin and the entire Fire brigade armies descending to put it out incident). Oh, and BTW, Alex did admit he had got a teeny bit slap happy with the paraffin stuff to light up the BBQ, but honest to goodness, it did not warrant the magnanimous explosion...

Earlier on that day, Esmie had been busy decorating herself

with GROWN UP nail varnish

Monty this morning, announces he would like to invite us all, including Buster our nephew, to watch a Star Wars lego battle between the Jedis and the baddies…We all accepted with glee, and set a date at 10 am. We all show up, as Monty hurries us up the stairs, insisting on putting on the Star Wars theme tune on loop, whilst he battles. He begins, the baddies are all introduced, their weapons, their flyable offable bits, their hidden invisible bits and their powers. 20 minutes later, he begins to introduce the goodies…Finally, battle commences, and Star Wars blares away downstairs, we answer appropriately (enough) to the commentary my son is so enthusiastically giving. Although I declare ‘oh nooo, not him’ at one point, and my son looks at me and says matter of factly that it’s fine, it’s good, he was a traitor and a baddy…OK, woop woop.  

A leaking ear (again) meant a trip to the Drs again again aginan (well you try writing that quickly and correctly on your knee at 11pm at night after you burned your car out…) for Mitzi moo. She had grommets put in some months back, and so although she still gets the infections, she is not ‘ill’ each time with it, temperature, agonising ear ache etc. she seems unbothered, more tired, but not many symptoms other than the constant stream of puss from her ear *everyone begins retching a little* Sorry. Next time I’ll put a ‘rank health symptoms’ warning sign up.

So she is about to start school on Monday, with another ear infection, and on antibiotics…poor baby. It’s the perfect excuse to the teacher for any bad behaviour or ‘pretending not to have heard you’ tactics, she literally is deaf in that ear it is so bunged up, so once I let the teacher know, they can blame any ‘unpositive’ behaviour on a deaf ear.

STILL in Minnie mouse costume (3 days) and MAN those ears are starting to weigh me down, mum...

The week end fast approaches, I stink of burned car, it is back to SCHOOL and me off to work (very part time) at the same time. So I am on mental preparation survival mode, I need all the help I can get!

See you tomorrow,

Tamsyn *runs out of mental preparation coping techniques, commences rocking in the corner stance*