Saturday, 10 September 2011

10 Things I learned From This Week...week 8

Well I couldn't put this up till the rugby had finished, Alex had to watch it on the internet (no working T.V)...So rather late in the day, my '10 Things I Learned From This Week’ this week is based on the theme of my mental life, so here goes...

1 That 3 fines in one week, one for doing 2.5 mph over the limit, one for the back indicator not working, er how the hell am I supposed to know? I am driving, not pushing (thankfully yet) my burned out car, one for forgetting to buy a parking ticket and being fined for that too, is NO fun.

2 That buying an expensive bottle of whiskey for my friend who has taken no payment for the chickens and ducks she has given me, and in handing it to them, not realising the seal on the bottom was not sturdy enough, and it smashing to smitherines and whiskey fumes on their doorstep, is B*****KS.

3 That having a BBQ too close too an open car, covered in chicken hoof scratches, WILL set it on fire, obviously.

4 That turning up for the school meeting with the teacher at my son’s new school, mascared up and ready, waiting on my tod for half and hour for everyone to arrive, then reading the actual date-next Friday, is embarrassing.

5 That I LOVE school time, I love the routine, the communication with the outside world, other bedraggled sent slightly mad, was once sane before kids, dropping their tired, still stuffing down their breakfast with mums brushing hair out of the school gates, I feel not so alone…

6 That I am helplessly in love with my kids and husband, that they are EVERYTHING to me, my whole world.

7 That I am very, very, very tired, and have a very, very, very hectic weekend approaching…

8 That when the dude in the petrol garage looks at you and tells you you should probably get your car seen too, you were only in yesterday weren’t you? Yes, but to be fair, when you only ever have a tenner to scrape together from down the backs of sofas, life’s like that, he is gonna see me regularly, so get over it and stop giving me a complex about my burned out gypsy wagon!

9 That Alex is on the brink of starting rugby-stirring up a ‘lost’ youth…

10 That my Monty, is too excited about going to football today, and I am SO proud of him!

Right, that's it folks, see you all tomorrow, it's blazing hot here today and so we're off for an afternoon at the beach...weyhey!

See ya,

Tamsyn x

Friday, 9 September 2011

A burned top and white bottom...

Scrubbing at a stain on the floor for bloody ages, which turned out to be a shadow, it sets me thinking, sometimes life is full of them, shadows on the floor, that you spend hours of wasted time battling through, and all you end up learning, is that all you can actually do, is deal with it. Get on with the rest of life that is good, which seems in miniscule proportion to the shit that befalls you at times. Whoa, that was deep, and heavy, anyway, about my day…

Wednesday was a day where I went out at 8 am, and did not get back in fully till 6.30 pm and with all the kids in tow, that's a fair length of a day. I popped back by briefly to make a soup and bread for tea, put a few washes on, hang a few out, and OUT, in the car everyone! Again. Mitzi went to her first gymnastics' class today, and LOVED it! Fab, I am so pleased, she is a little monkey (said in that very affectionate, but slightly OMG what is she? Tone) and for her to express herself in this monkey way OUT of the house, can only be a positive thing, so there she was. First gym class, bowling over success.

I pick her up, go straight to the Breaker’s yard to see how much an Espace would be, and buy it with the intention to use all the parts, replacing the burned out, chicken hoof scratched abominability that is, my car. The dude is rude and moody and apparently has a wasp stuck in his tooth, good. That’ll teach him for being totally unnecessarily offensive and dismissing me with his arm and a ‘no, it’s not for sale’, turning his back and walking off. Ok, fine. Next stop garage, the garage dude is a sweetheart, and he advises me on the best course of procedure for the car, which, well, bloody hell, it’s a nightmare. Then it’s onto the shop to order a duck, but I can’t get the same race, as I have NO idea what I am talking about when it comes to ducks, fowl or poultry in general. I can determine a goose from a turkey, but otherwise, nada. He reels off a few races, the dude at the counter, to a crazy, blank looking English woman, and nothing he is saying means ANYTHING to me, not just because I am English this time. I tell him this. Then I did remember they were 'edible' ducks, after the ones plucked, gutted and hanging up at my friends' house, I assume that's why...not just for fun surely, and she's never mentioned a penchant for Taxidermy before. So he yells out to his mate 'they're for eating, Baz',  (I here protest that we are not buying them to eat them, I don't want everyone thinking I am a duck murderer) we reckon we get close to the 'right' race. So we decide it is best to order a male and a female, that way, at least 2 will ‘mix’. We want baby ducks you see…well, I know I say ‘we’ but I mean it in the royalist sense possible…as always!

Then Mitzi moo has her ear specialist appointment, the kids sit patiently, not getting up once from their chairs for 20 minutes in the waiting room, one woman asked me if I had drugged them? I replied I kept a cattle prod in my hand bag…not sure if she knew I was joking, or was I? The upshot is she has to have an analysis on her ear to find out what exactly is the germ causing the ear to be inflamed and full of ooooozing gallons of puss oh, too late, I had told you all I’d put up an ‘attention rank health symptoms' warning before. Oh well. So the operation is small, they get a sample from the inner ear and send it off thus determining the germ and giving her the correct treatment. Man, I hope the course of steroids clears it up before then, then she won’t have to go through that. So there we go, pretty much end of, and I thought I’d chill at the park with them a while…I got in 2 ½ hrs later, hot, tired and Frenched out. I sometimes get Frenched out, when I have a headache/am reeeaaallly tired, my brain prefers not to work, neither in English or French, so chatting away enthusiastically for 2 hours to some friends left me broken, not the kids for once!

So that was refreshing, anyway they are all now as fast asleep as logs/dogs whichever one you use, as they are. And I am off to eat the potato I just got out, wondering why it had a burned top and white bottom, I had accidentally set the cooker to grill, woopdidoop, dinner’s gonna be nice Alex…

See you tomorrow,

Tamsyn x

Wednesday, 7 September 2011


Emotional, was not the word for Monday. I am fighting a lump in my throat as we speak (me and the voices in my head). It was the ultimate Tempestrian weather, thunder and lightning. I bundled all and the soppiest dog in the world who knows he gets to come on school runs again several time a day, he loves it! Into the burned out car. I quickly fashioned a cover for one seat over the weekend, but with no sewing machine, by hand was lengthy and very like I was a maiden embroidering for pleasure in a rocking chair.. not that I have one (a maiden or a rocking chair...), but you get the gist. So they all wanted that place, but the seatbelt that side was burned to a strip, so they can’t. Why did I bother? I first spent 55 minutes queuing at Lola’s school, the odd EXTREMELY rude ‘oh but I’ve got to get to work’ mother pushing in (yeah, well, I have 4 schools to drop everyone off to in the rain single handed, so P*SS off!)Which I refrained from saying, I smiled meekly, in case they were important mummies in the PTA or something…after she is dropped off, we all run back to the car, get in and go down to Monty’s school, 8.50 was the ‘Rentree’ school time to be there, 9.40 was when we showed up. Monty and I were met with scowls, but when I apologised, soaked through to the skin, explaining the lack of Airoplane and parachutes for the kids, I had to take them all separately to their 4 different schools. She mellowed, good job, I was about ready to lamp someone. Monty runs in, all chuffed to see his friends he has not seen all Summer, with a ‘Salut Maitress, je suis Monty, l’anglais’ (hiya teacher, I am Monty, the English dude) and a ‘see ya tonight, mum, love you’…he’s gone, big school, he is not phased by. Brilliant! 2 down, 2 to go.
Everyday at school last year, Mitzi cried, this year I fear the same, but today, as she is in the ‘big’ class in the Primary school, and as we have been here for nearly 3 years now, I know the teacher well, and the teaching assistant. She too, waltzes in, ignoring the teacher’s ‘ca va, Mitzi?’ I pull her back to answer, realising he’s asked her quietly, she did not hear (ear still oozing, just seen Dr tonight who has referred to the ENT specialist again, poor baby),. Already working, yes! The ‘oh, it’s not her fault, she didn’t hear you’. Anyway, 3, successfully down, the last now…The emotion builds up as we approach, I know her teacher really well, she’s a friend in fact, but not even this is a comfort to Esmie. The teaching assistant is a neighbour, oh, she’s my friend who was duck plucking the other day, my friend who gives me the ducks and chickens (although the sucks (haha, meant to write 'ducks' just reread this too late, 8 hours after I posted it!) have fooked off, and the chickens are nasty ass bastards, but that’s by-the-by), so there we go, I am happy as it’s not completely strange to her. She is inconsolable, and I leave (being told to!) in tears myself.
I have spent the day worrying, dealing with loads of b*llsh*t, which seems to be streaming in in it’s hoards into our letter box and other wise at the moment. I tackle it all, and I follow thought processes through and everything! I am feeling kinda beaten at the moment, we got a parking ticket (took kids to beach COMPLETELY forgot to buy a ticket F***), a speeding fine for going 7 kmh over the limit, and a fine for our back indicator not working, yeah well, have you looked on the INSIDE??? Not only that the work I thought was a definite, seems to be more vague now, and I am feeling a bit lost. Well, I felt a bit lost, then I baked bread, ironed, tidied, hovered, baked mini chocolate cakes for the kids and decided to make my own flyers/carsd, and be my own ‘Teacher of English’ off my own bat. So I got going designing a flyer. It’s s*** for the record, so I am attempting round 2 of designing work tomorrow. I do not want ‘happy kids laughing and learning’ or hands stretched out holding onto each other ‘breaking the language barriers’, maybe I’ll put a donkey on it, well it’ll get their attention…And then I felt a bit better, determining my own future, until my husband gives in to the ‘can we have number 5 yet?’ requests…(do I put an exclamation mark to suggest I am joking?). Esmie cried a lot of the morning, and was in my friend’s arms, then settled down in the afternoon, when I came early to watch them in the playground, she looked at me, waved and looked blankly at me, no smile, no nothing…poor me! I think she thought I had abandoned her, having never been with out me. But the monkey cuddle when I pick her up, makes up for it all…

So there we go, first day back at school, and I missed them terribly, I was SO happy to see all their little growing up faces tonight. I have also pre-prepared a story, for when I get the ‘no, don’t read us a story mummy, tell us one, oh please oh please’ requests later on, I am ready! A fox, a boy, a rabbit warren and a baby rabbit saved…there, that ought to do…

Have a great day all...

Tamsyn x

Tuesday, 6 September 2011

Monday, 5 September 2011


I am always encouraged to finish sentences, frequently drifting off mid sentence, having just seen something pretty. Or I suddenly just can’t be bothered to carry on the sentence…In fact other people’s catch phrase for me is ‘Well, finish your sentence then…’ And by ‘then’ I guess they mean, so we can actually follow through with a conversation, which helps I suppose when the other person at least manages to finish a sentence. Anyway, my point was going to be…ooooh look, a pretty moth has just flown against the lamp…*bzzzzzzzp* oh no, dead.
Summer fun is over...

My ducks, bar one, have f*****d flown off, I have no idea why, well I do actually, it was MY fault. I had been meaning to clip their wings since I noticed them flying around the garden. But I had not had the time or patience (as I write this, I have trapped a cockroach under my foot which I am about to flush down the bog, but I thought I’d tell you because it’s GROSSING me OUT)…Right, I am back, flushed, is the cockroach, and toilet gelled after, just to make sure. So yep, they’re gone, thus I had a trip down to my friend’s house, to see if she had any more to buy. The kids see me and tell me their mum is in the garage, she then calls me into the garage. I swing open the door, and what I come across is a slaughter scene from the 'worst horror cruelty to animals specifically ducks and chickens' film ever made, ducks, chickens, blood, birds hanging from the ceiling, her husband is busy plucking a duck, she’s bloody aproned up, gutting them. ‘OMG!’ I cry, I cannot help myself, I retch a bit at the smell and the death scene, and advance, covering my eyes, tripping over a dead duck on the floor. She is laughing at me (I get this a lot, people laughing AT me), and asks what I was after? I carry on babbling away, hands firmly over my squeezed shut eyes, I tell her about my duck scenario, she tells me she can’t help, as they’re keeping a few to breed, and the rest are for eating. Oh, you don’t say? I had a lump in my throat as I left, but to give them credit, they grow ALL their own, and eat it too, so I respect that. MURDERING B*****DS! (unnecessary outburst, I actually do have respect for that, even if it does freak me out and seem somewhat intense).

I Sprung cleaned like the maniac that I am all day Saturday, getting all things ready, first day back to school hair style requests from girls, leave mine alone mum, from Monty, and stripping everything, curtains, beds, you name it, I washed it to within an inch of it’s life at 90 degrees today. School bags, check, pens, boards, folders, pencil cases and all paraphanalias sorted, check (almost) and clothes ironed and all ready for going BACK TO SCHOOL! I am a bit nervous, I hope they are all happy and settled in their new classes and schools, they seem to be excited enough, even Esmie!
She can actually wash her face in her toilet....weirdo

Just before bed tonight, we’ve not managed to find time yet to fit in the 3rd round of Monty’s Star Wars battles, so I had a quick session under Monty’s den with him, where upon he informs me he is going to film his Star Wars Lego battles, and put them up on Youtube, he has made a sign for under his bed saying ‘Monty’s Star Wars Lego’ so expect you all to be avid watchers…!

With that, I am off, it’s back to school tomorrow, and I am sad. I bloody miss those kids, for all they do, the good and the bad.

See you tomorrow,

Tamsyn *will not brave the loo, as worries that cockroach is still sitting fast, covered in toilet gel, in toilet bowl and will wriggle up my  ….OMG*

Sunday, 4 September 2011

Thought For The Day Week 14...

This week has been the last in the holidays, lots of things are changing, I am feeling more grown up than ever, I start part time work. So I am stepping out of comfort zones, and my baby starts school 2 days a week too...empty nest syndrome! Anyway, with all this in mind, I decided to put up a song today, but the real verse I find the most emotive I have put below. I played it on repeat when I was a youngster, and the lyrics are so poignant...It is my Thought For The Day this week...

You’re still so young to travel so far,

Old enough to know who you are

Wise enough to carry the scars

Without any blame, there’s no one to blame...

Crowded House, listen to the full tune above.

See you all tomorrow!

Tamsyn x