Wednesday, 8 May 2013

Dear Alex, Regaining Control.

May 7th 2013

Dear Alex,

Day coming to a close, after school club runs finally over, kids, at last, asleep. Ticking clock the only noise, my dog comes over for a nuzzle. I am sat, as every evening I am, in front of my computer, page open, another letter to you.

I have felt so positively about your progress the past few weeks, and I realised today that your emotions  are more in control too. I visit you at the Care Home, although you cry (as you usually do when I come in) you quickly pull yourself together. You have made yourself do that, no instruction from me. Displaying that you are regaining control of your emotions, that you are also seeing relevant responses to situations. You are regaining some control!

So much progress, it seems to have suddenly sprung up. I feel calmer and less sad as a result, because I see for the first time since your accident, I see you slightly as I used to, this is not meant in a derogatory way, far from it, I mean that when I look at you, you do not seem as far away, as different. Even some of your facial expressions have begun to change as you have more control over your muscles and expressions.

I haven't felt this positive about your progress for such a long time.

I see, I think, where you can be, and I love the feeling of hope growing, hope fuelled thoughts, true bliss...

So I pause, for a while, mentally. I hope with progress blossoming. I look back at where we came from, and am looking forward, not peeking scared and alone at my future, but accepting and breathing in our future, with hope and some peace.

Alex, you are SO strong, so amazing and so loved.

me xxxxxxxx

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