Saturday, 16 March 2013

Dear Alex, Quieter Life.

17th March 2013

Dear Alex,

I hear you cough downstairs, you've been in bed all day. An extremely nasty tummy bug has hit and you couldn't and didn't want to get out of bed.

A rare afternoon that I spend with Monty and three if his friends. My lovely friend took the girls to the cinema so I was able to take him without his little sisters tagging on! It was his very belated birthday trip, six months late! But I got round to it in the end. It was such a treat, I have been looking forward to it since I booked it for him. They went on a spy mission and were Special Agents, in their element! I felt so privileged to be around, to call him my son. Feeling completely fulfilled at being able to do things for him today, but on any day, whatever it is, for our kids, I love nothing better.

It was an afternoon off before being back to help you out with your troubles!

Mitzi, Monty, Lola have all decided to sleep in the other room tonight, so I lie in bed with Esmie, just us two. The first time ever I haven't got between 3 and 4 kids in with me! She breathes, her lips pout, I pray quietly for my little angel.

Life has been quieter recently, the usual chaotic existence, but I suppose my mind has felt quieter somehow. I feel less strung out maybe not having to do the long journeys to see you everyday, less of the mental strain and the guilt of leaving you as now you are home more than you are at the home.

Or maybe it's the vast improvements I have seen in you? Being able to converse with you, your speech has been incredible, so clear, your wit quick, and I chat with you and my smile beams, bright and proud as the sheer delight in your chatting so clearly lifts the fog for me, as I see so much more of you.

So much more...

Me xxxxxxxx

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