Monday, 3 October 2011

I fling open the wardrobe and grab randomly at clothes, with the intent of covering my ‘bits’ well, you never know?

I began the evening with kids in bed, sitting down, downing a large glass of water (thirsty work running kids you know…) Alex walks back in the room as I place the glass down. ‘Did you just drink from that glass?’ Oh God, here we go…it turns out he had just trapped the enlarged angry mutant hornet which had been terrorising anything and everything in our bedroom in that very same glass. I sat there for the next half hour, waiting, waiting and wondering what the side effects may be. I was a sitting scientific experiment waiting to react physiologically on some global level. After half an hour, and no, as yet, debilitating side effects, I begin to move slowly, checking myself limb by limb, reflexes, OK, mouth, throat, tongue, still capable (to the extent they ever are at any rate) so I begin to relax.
The support team!

I head off for a quick bath, come back in, sit down to write my blog. As I do so, either the same, or a different (my word they are HUGE mother f******, just for the record, and they always seem so p****d off, unnecessarily, they are the dark side, not us, little innocent humans they chose to sting with intent to KILL! KILL! KILL!). So he’s back in the bed room, I am starker’s, having just had a bath, and think quickly, if I cover my eyes, maybe he won’t see me, no, OK I am not 5-years-old anymore, so I fling open the wardrobe and grab randomly at clothes, with the intent of covering my ‘bits’ well, you never know? It seems to be dive bombing me and I flail around wildly, letting out sporadic squeals tripping over putting trousers on and freaking out hearing buzzing getting closer as I T-shirt my upper body up and thus for the few seconds I am pulling on the T-shirt I am blinded, FREAKING. It dive bombs me and lands on my head well of course I flip and slap myself on the head??? Hornets, I do not do. Wasps, mean, but small, doable, bees, pretty cute really, they’re a breed that subconsciously feel so guilty after stinging someone once, they actually die, so I hold nothing against them, but are stepping into a WHOLE different flying stinging insect level. It was a success though, I was not stung, and we used the glass again to get it out and slammed the window shut after and wrote a ‘you are not welcome hornets’ sign up on the window. They can read you know. A resounding success; and this time the glass is sterilised.

Monty in action!

Monty had a football tournament this Saturday, and my God it was hot. 33 degrees and the 1st of October. Full summer, he played like a star, made such an effort and although they did not win I blame this on the other weaker pathetic playing kids…OK, bit full on, they all ‘did their best’ and that’s what counts isn’t it? Unless you want to win…?! I cheer him on in French, not wanting to stand out too much, Alex doesn’t care and is English and vocal and loudly too…oh the shame…

Monty taking the 'offside' kick? I think that's what it's called, oh my shamefull ignorance...

Sunday we spent with a phone call at 11am a friend wanting to know if I could look after her kids this afternoon, she’d be round in 15. Ok, unprepared, but still, a friend in need and all that, so she drops them off, and 6 kids blowing bubbles in their water and having a food fight (quickly stopped as the chickens got wind of it) was not what I had had on the agenda for today. But it was in fact cut short, her hubby had arrived back early, and after 2 hours (not the original ‘oh, till about 8 this evening’) their daddy is here to pick them up. So I am free, well, 2 kids down, leaving me with 4. Homework done, we’re off to the football grounds for Alex and Monty to do a bit of training, and me to do a nature walk and 'throwing and catching' with the girls (not throwing them, I hasten to add). I am pretty rubbish at catching, something will catch my attention, I get it in the face, or I just focus SO intensely that I hold my arms out too wide like a kid and it slips right on through. My girls are great, but catching is not our forte (although Mitzi is brilliant but I don’t want to take anything away from the concentrated efforts of the other 2) Esmie, every time she catches it, and in catching, this ranges from it falling on the ground near her, and her picking it up whooping coz she has ‘caught’ it, to mini strops when she misses it and it’s the other person’s fault for throwing a rubbish throw. But all in all, it was a great afternoon.
A VERY hot, VERY thirsty Monty! Nice work son!

The weather is unbelievable at the moment, and we are making the most of it, November, it rains. It has every single year since we have been here, and I now begin to dread November here each year. It’s bloody miserable torrential rain, that seems completely unnecessary. Well, we are still in October, so I am focussing on this.

Now, I am off to check out the food I am probably burning, and sign everything for school I was supposed to sign and give back 3 weeks ago now…

See you tomorrow!

Tamsyn x *sees hornet tapping at the window, refers it to the sign, it nods dejectedly and flies off to dive bomb other naked humans*

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