Wednesday, 10 August 2011

The 'flap' look is never gonna be a good look...

There is something wrong with my kids, VERY wrong, like mentally, in the head-they asked me to ‘turn up’ James Blunt. Now if you read my blog, James Blunt, as I am sure you do, I apologise, in all honesty, I quite liked ‘you’re boooootiful, tis true’ but WTF is all the rest of the crap you have been churning out ever since? As usual, the French are BIG fans, anything musically pants is welcome here, thus Jamie B is BIG over here. At any rate, the kids need channelling down other music routes, and QUICK.


Oh, so this is what you looked like back in 1973....



There is also, something dire wrong with me, having a sort through of some old stuff tucked away in bags within boxes within boxes within bags, I came across a Mariah Carey tape. Did I actually just say that out loud? Oh, yes I did, bad scene, no retracting now. I have no recollection of buying it to be fair, so can I be let off? Phew! Thanks…*bursts secretly into Mariah Carey style singing as been practising her singing voice for years*


OOOOOO you're so pretty Mariah...you have even tamed butterflies...

So, what news?? Well, Monty Buster had his first ever hair cut today, I must add, ‘at the hairdressers’ , he has not been wandering around a male version of Rapunzel, Rapunzel let down your hair…He loved it, and he looks a thousand times better. I however, nearly had a b*tch fight with the stupid wench that cut his hair. She wanted to set the ‘Tondeuse’ (the word for a lawnmower, in French, but in fact it is also the same  for clippers) Monty was somewhat worried at the thought of her lawn mowing his head…Anyway, the nasty woman wanted to hack it all off. I however, preferred her going for a shorter version of what he had already. So did he, I wasn’t being an overbearing mother, I just know what my kids want, they do not need to give their opinion… He is fussed over like a poodle in a poodle parlour, washed, hair cut, and blow dried. In the interim, after the ‘so what shall we do with his hair today, then?’ the silly cow and I have a Mexican stand off through the hair dressing mirror. She was determined to use the clippers, but backed down, she gets busy snipping, I give a little ‘not tooooo short’ squeak like someone squeezing a weasel-a reflex action. She hacks away threateningly, glancing over. After, she sighs heavily, looks at me, ‘will THAT do Madame?’ (Madame? cheeky bitch, she’s not that much younger than me…or maybe I’m in intense denial, very possible…) and actually, as it happens, no it will not do. She made a right bat’s arse of it, not that I have ever intensely studied bats’ arses, but she has done just that. All weird and long at the back, and a bit ‘mullety’. I ask her to take a bit more off, to stop the ‘flap look’, the flap look is never gonna be a good look…not on anyone, let alone a small male child. She rolls her eyes, actually rolls her eyes, ‘Well, I’ve done the cut now.’ To which I reply, ‘well, to be fair, you have still got the scissors in your hand, so if you would…’ she huffs (WTF kind of hairdressing world is this?) snips unevenly and goes, ‘There, will that do?’. I give in, that’s gonna have to do, after all, she is at an advantage, she has sharp scissors in her hand and my boy in front of her. ‘Fine’ I say, although at this point I can not even look her in the eye, I am seething. We pay, and scarper. I am sure she snips after me with her scissors.


Don't care what face you pull, you're still getting the chop..



My parents-in-law are off tomorrow. My father-in-law is stiff as a board, he’s made us a super DELUXE chicken house! All out of reclaimed wood too. I am hugely impressed. As are the chickens, 48 hours he has been slaving away at it! The roof goes on tomorrow! My M-in-law too is ruined, she’s been on cooking duties for us all too! So they’re off tomorrow! I have my meeting tomorrow with me new boss (after re-read, I did mean to write ‘my’ but I quite like the Dick Van Dyke cockney accent thing going on there), to finalise start dates, and the like! I am really looking forward to it.





So, on that note, I shall leave you all.





See you all tomorrow, 

Tamsyn x *sets off to hunt down hairdresser*

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