Friday, 15 July 2011

Keep them orally amused...


This would so not be allowed in France..
We’ve had a bit of a rough deal, apart from Monday, weather wise. But to be honest it’s been no bad thing. As it is tax time of year in France, and as Alex is in the process of changing his ‘status’ in France, we are tackling the most mind blowingly, extraordinary missions impossible ever known to man, donkey or beast. So the poor long-enduring kids (although they get a snack pack with treats in, a lollipop, as that lasts sooooooo long, a little bottle of water (the novelty value of the little bottle, although it's been re-filled, works a treat), rice cakes, apples and if we’re gonna be out for AGES and AGES and AGES, not just ages, a big biscuit too. At the end of the rounds, I unleash the chickens, who I have been starving for the 3 hours we’ve been out, and they peck themselves to flappy heaven on rice cake crumbs. Nice. Economical hovering, the next trend…NO more Henry hoovers, get yourself a chook. Anyway, the snacks keep them orally amused. Verbally, we play ‘Who am I' I play it, and they act as my Freuds, psychoanalysing their mother, as I am still trying to find 'me'…Actually you give 3 clues, and the aim is to guess what the person/thing the person was thinking of. And when I can’t stand it any longer, we listen to the songs on the radio loudly, and I culture them in sh*t French music, because OMG, have you EVER heard any French pop music? By God and gibbons, it’s single nation handedly THE most awful b******s you have ever had inflicted on you. They must have used some of their very popular, always played, duets between 'torn, confused dude' and 'miserable, ‘oh but I can’t’'  lady, as toture techniques during the war, and since... And I also, sporadically, get to educate them on the good stuff, Tina Turner, who has no idea what love has got to do with it (and you know what, compared to the French sh*t she is outstanding), Phil Colins, because Jesus knows him, U2, when are they ever going to find what they’re looking for? Poor sods, and Mika, who evidently squeezes his nuggets and goes for it with the high notes…And they take toys, pens and paper, so it could be worse. But I really do feel for them. Unfortunately all this boring bollocks does have to be done though.
Having said all this, tomorrow will be nice! Apparently, as so far, it looks like Autumn has hit in our garden, full of brown leaves falling off the trees, it’s madness. We have had hot days hither and thither but the temperature in general has been 10 degrees milder than this time last year. So with nice weather hitting, we’re doing some ‘boring stuff’, as the kids call it, in the morning, then hitting the beach the whole rest of the afternoon, and dad is on surfing lesson duties! What fun shall be had by all…I shall let you know how it goes no doubt…unless I am hospitalised in surfing attempts, yes, even I may brave it! If you can’t beat them (and I can’t beat my husband, I’ve tried with a big stick, he just grabs it and twists me round and round on the end of it till I drop off dizzy)…
Down at the bottom of our garden...
The kids were desperate to get to bed tonight. After the afternoon and surfing lessons with daddy and uncle Jamie, we got in at 6, we all quickly whipped up some chocolate cakes, and ate our tea, then they clean their teeth and run upstairs to bed…Yes there is a reason they are so keen-not because I have decided to get my lie ins by fashioning them beds made out of gingerbread and sweets, well, it’d amuse them for hours, surely…hey, maybe I am on to yet another good idea, brainwashing and edible kids beds. I’ll keep you posted…the reason is, because they are ‘camping’ tonight. It’s the holidays, and they like to all go ‘camping’ in Monty’s room, yes, I know, I actually let them too. Mattresses are squished together on the floor, no one is asleep, they are drinking milk and eating the cakes we made, then it’s a story by torch light, and camp fires out…

‘Daddy is lost’, Ezza pipes up to Mitzi....

You know what? I am going to do part 2 tomorrow...! I am to bore you no longer, letting you off early tonight, for good behaviour...

Till tomorrow,
Tamsyn x

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