I really am tired of looking like mother druggie…!

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My John Mcenroe mini-me, get that attitude!

Well 3am Wednesday morning, that was it, I was up, the night was gone. And yes, Wednesday is the day they have no school in France, so with toothache, the likes of which I have never had before in my long legged life, I was more than a little pissed off that I was going to have to run and entertain my self-created kindergarten, with toothache, agonising shooting pains and temperature, oh, yeah, and no sleep…

I have to ring the dentist, there is no way this is normal, I ring, sounding a bit drunk, as I can hardly open my mouth it’s hurting to breathe. His only appointment is not till 7 pm that evening…I would have to spend the whole day like this. OMG. So I did 4 loads of washing, cooked, cleaned, entertained the masses and got on with the day. Returning from the dentist, I wonder whether I was in fact mistaken, and had accidentally swung by the vets. The horse-sized dose of antibiotics (it turns out, it’s an abscess), that he gave me are just not compatible with human beings. How does one swallow a pill the size of a small hamster? With great difficulty, I can assure you. This set me off wondering whether in fact they were meant for elsewhere…As the French are renowned for their penchant to use ulterior routes for their medicines. Although I very much doubt I’ll be giving it a whirl…”Excuse me kids just a mo, you carry on with what you’re doing, mummy’s just off to the bathroom to see whether this pill is meant for elsewhere…! “.

At one point, whilst I am making the tea, all goes quiet…time to panic, time to panic big-time. Quiet where there are four children=kids in the process of silently destroying things/walls/bed covers/sofa throws/animals, that general type of thing. I sprint into the bedroom like a crazed lady, the 3 big ones are quietly drawing, complimenting each other on their masteries (very sweet), then my eyes fall on the littlest, Esmie, she gets a little fright in seeing me, and looks at me with HUGE big black panda eyes, yes, she’s discovered my mascara’s hiding place…black everywhere. Still, I console myself, at least it’s not indelible ink. Thursday was all too quiet for me. I was still feeling rough and some weird drug induced shakes going on (prescrption drugs I must add), I had such a relaxing day! It is unheard of usually, all there was was the school run (the mother with toothache and drug induced shakes, this was gonna look good…), few loads of washing to do, hang out, bit of ironing, entertainment for the toddler who is now going through a John Mcenroe mini-me phase, insisting on self-hairdressing (scissors NO where to be found; I have learned, we are still growing out her ‘tufts’) with a hair band that she has taken to. Oh yes, my lazy day, I had a lil mop too, you know, as you do, and I hung out all by my little self for 27 minutes and 8 seconds (I have a stop watch) and had a coffee in the garden, occasionally being pecked by a chicken. Then Esmie woke up from her 4 hour sleep…I know, 4 hours, this is an absolute record, and I am stamping on my own feet as I write this for not having recording every element of the day, military style, to reflect upon and copy to the T the next day. But I didn’t, so we’ll be back to one hour, but there’s worse things that happen at sea apparently, according to my dad that is. As I am outside, I witness my chicken Margo, laying her egg over the back of the box they have found to lay their eggs in. I mean, really, what is the use in that? It plopped out of her backside and landed splat! Right on the ground. Useless chicken. Well, I have a busy week end ahead of me, and typing with these shakes is doing my head in! I hope they wear off soon, as I really am tired of looking like mother druggie…! Have a great weekend every one!

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